Divorce

Well the title says it all. This is why I've been asking for prayers. I found out on Christmas Eve that my husband was cheating on me and that he wanted a seperation. For the last month it has just gotten worse and worse between us and we are now getting a divorce.

The last few days since he's told me he's moving out this weekend we've been getting along better and actually talking about things but divorce is the last thing I want. He does not share my same feelings and no matter what is going to divorce me. I don't think that divorce is right and we could have worked it out in marriage counseling but he did not want to try and there is nothing I can do about that.

I am trying to move on with my life for me and Asha. The hardest part about this all is the promise that is getting broken to Asha's birthmother. She trusted us to give Asha a good stable home and now we have failed her. I am going to do my best to give Asha a good stable home but if her birthmother wanted her to be raised by a single mother she would have kept her.

I am feeling terribly guilty about it even though it's not my fault. I am not the one who cheated and is walking away from my family but I just feel so bad for what it might do to Asha's birthmother. I do feel she has a right to know especially since we are so close. She is like the sister I never had. I just don't ever want her to doubt her decision to place Asha with us.

It's been a really hard month and I'm hoping once my husband and Dakota are moved out that I will be able to move on and be strong for Asha.

Thank you all for your prayers and please keep them coming because I need to find a job to help support Asha and I and I'm sure I will still have hard days. I could use all the prayers and good thoughts I can get.