Adoption Again?

Well we just had our taxes done yesterday and it was a pleasant suprise as to how much we are getting back. I am so excited because the money is putting us closer to our goal of HOPEFULLY starting the adoption process again next year.

Asha will be 3 next year and I think by then she will be able to handle having a younger sibling. I too will be able to handle another baby alot better with her being a little older. I'm not the kind of person who could handle two children close in age.

My mind is just swimming now about all the possibilities. We know that we want another girl. I never had any siblings growing up and I would have loved to have had a sister. I really think Asha will like having a younger sister. She played much better with the little girl I babysat than the little boy.

We also want to adopt another little girl with Asha's beautiful skin color. We want her to look around our family and see someone else who resembles her. I think this is really important to bring more diversity into our family and for her to have someone to share her heritage with and some of the life problems that may come from being adopted or even from being African American. We can try to help her but we could never understand as well as another sibling who may be going through it as well.

Our problem now is how to go about adopting again. I want to do domestic adoption again but am so scared of going through all the emotional turmoil we had prior to adopting Asha. I don't know if my heart could take it again but this time around may be easier since I do have Asha and know what to expect already of the process. My husband wants to adopt from Liberia which was also a dream for both of us but I enjoyed the baby stage so much with Asha that I would love to do it again from the beginning. They grow so fast and it would be so hard for me to celebrate a 1 year birthday after only having them home for a few short months. I still haven't had my baby fix yet and would really like to have another itty bitty baby here to cuddle.

I also love open adoption. We have an amazing relationship with Asha's bmom and I would love the opportunity to do it again. I know it will be different than our current relationship with Asha's bmom but I think adopted children grow up happier knowing where they came from and who they look like. I like being able to e-mail Asha's bmom and ask questions about their family and heritage so I can pass it on to her. This means alot to me and I think it will mean alot to Asha and our new baby as well.

I guess it will be a year long discussion between my husband and I until we have to make a decision next year. I will keep you all posted.