Missing My Girl!!

I am missing Asha so bad this weekend. We've really been having alot of fun lately now that I've got a system down for her tantrums and rages and she's been having fewer of both. Plus I just had her for 2 weeks in a row and it's hard to not have her here. All I wanted to do yesterday was call her but I didn't want to interrupt her fun so I didn't.

I had so many things I wanted to do this weekend and just didn't really do any of them. I'm just so sad without her here. Some weekends I am fine without her but for some reason this is a hard weekend. I don't know if it's because my in laws went down there as well and I feel like I'm missing out on something I used to be a part of or what but it's hard. That his my family down there having fun together and I'm here alone. Weekends like this really make me hate Josh. Most days I don't even really give him a second thought but when he has Asha that's all I can do is think about him and the fact that he has her and I want her here.

I didn't try out the new church this weekend so Asha and I will probably go next Saturday. I had a migraine the morning I wanted to go and that pushed everything back for the day. The only thing I really got accomplished this weekend was cleaning the house. It took a while for my migraine to go away and then by the time I got done cleaning church had already started. I could have gone this morning but didn't wake up until 10 am. Mindy I will let you know how I like the church next weekend.

I am excited about next weekend because I have a 3 day weekend and I get to spend it all with my girl!!!! We are going to go to the beach, and have picnics and go to parks and have a little fire outside and make toasted marshmallows and see fireworks and go to a celebration in our old town to play games and see old cars. She is just so much fun to be with and she cracks me up with the things she says and does. It should be a fun weekend!!

Yo Yo Kind of Week

It's been an interesting week around here. Probably just normal life things but some are taking their toll on me and some are just shocking me.

I don't even know where to start. The week started out rough with me not getting alot of sleep because I was in sooo much physical pain it kept waking me up. This keeps happening that once or twice a month it feels like there is something huge in me pushing all my insides out and when I even lay down or touch my back, sides or stomach area it hurts soooooooooo bad. I can't even sleep because the pain is so bad. I did tell my dr. and he just said it's tense muscles and gave me muscle relaxers but they scare me since my mom had a really bad accident with them (she pooped on my step dad in bed while they slept LOL). I really don't want that to happen to me so I won't take them. I really think it's something else but not sure what it could be but it hurts bad. Any way that went away after the first few days and I felt pretty good yesterday but work has been really busy and a little difficult this week also. It's like the lady I replaced told me when you finally think your doing something right you get yelled at that you are doing it wrong. The weird part is though that even though I was getting yelled at I was also getting complimented on how good a job I am doing which is where the shocking part comes in.

The other lady that works with me informed me yesterday that along with her I am also in the running for management. (Picture here a completely shocked face ) I have never been considered for management and was not even aware that this was an option since he knows I am a single parent and that my daughter comes first. I just assumed I would always be the secretary and maybe eventually the office manager but not in charge of a crew and stuff like that. I bet I could really make a good living with this company and he is very generous with raises but the unfortunate part is that he does not offer insurance and eventually I will need to find a job that has insurance if I want to ever make more money. I am pretty much at my max for hours and pay right now without loosing my insurance through the state. I don't plan on making $9 an hour for the rest of my life. If he would offer me insurance with that raise I just may stay forever. I love love love my job but need insurance more.

What makes it a yo yo week is that I was also pretty depressed the beginning of the week thinking about 4th of July and the fact that we wouldn't have a big family celebration this year like we normally do and it made me sad for me and Asha. I cried alot about it and then I realized that I was feeling sorry for myself which was just stupid because I was the one who planned all the fun activities for all the holidays so I am still here and I can still make this a fun 4th of July for me and Asha and that's what I'm going to do. I don't need Josh here for her and I to have fun. I actually have a very fun and busy weekend planned for us and there really isn't any room in our plans for anyone else. It's really nice to know that I can make plans and have them stick or cancel them and not have to worry about other people and their plans.

WOW is it Friday yet? LOL I have a pretty busy weekend planned for me too since Asha will be with her dad. I am going to try and get out there more and meet new people so I am going to visit a church at the end of my road this weekend and visit an Alanon group here in my new town as well. I love my old church and my old Alanon group but I just can't afford to drive back there for meetings and church so it's time to find some new places. Wish me luck ladies.

Have a GREAT weekend!!

June Dairy Days & Pictures

June Dairy Days was fun but VERY dusty. With all the rain we've been having I wouldn't have thought there would be that much dust flying around but Asha and I both needed baths by the time we got home.

Asha got to pet and feed a baby cow. They had a mamma horse and a baby horse for the kids to pet, some ducks, some sheep and a bunny. Asha loved it and really had alot of fun. They had free ice cream all over so she had a rootbeer float and then Culvers was there making free sundaes so she had some of those as well. She kept saying she was having an "ice cream picnic". It was so cute!!

She really liked feeding the baby cow. I couldn't get her to let other kids in to feed the cow because she wanted to stay there. They also had someone playing Polka music and she loved it. She kept stopping and dancing every time she would hear them.

It is finally staying nice here and not raining so much so we've been able to play outside more. We are still having some behavior problems so we only go outside if she is behaving but for the most part she's been great. She loves school and they have Sprinkler Days where the kids can bring their swimsuits and play int he sprinklers. Some days she does it some days she doesn't. She is kind of picky about water so it's hit and miss with that.

Well here are some pictures from June Dairy Days and just some random pictures.

Here's Asha eating her rootbeer float.

Here she is feeding her favorite baby cow. He was so sweet.

Here she has climbed up on the railing to try and pet the sheep. It was hard to get alot of good pictures because there were so many kids trying to push their way to the animals.

Her new favorite obsession is her pink footy pajamas. She found them in her drawer a few days ago and put them on and hasn't really wanted to take them off since. As soon as we get home from school/work she puts them on. It's a struggle to even get her dressed in the morning because she wants to wear them EVERYWHERE!!

We are enjoying our summer so far and we're looking to the 4th of July. I did her hair in red, white and blue beads last night and I will eventually get a picture of that up.

She is with her dad right now that's why I have time to blog. I will keep trying to update as much as I can. Being a single parent is a pretty busy job and she is still pretty clingy when we are together so it makes it hard to blog when she's trying to sit on the keyboard. LOL

She Made Breakfast

I just have to share what just happened.

Asha made her own breakfast. I was in the shower and when I came out she had gone in the fridge and gotten one of those little plastic applesauce containers out with the tin lid for travel and she opened it all by herself and made herself breakfast. She's never done that before. I was just so impressed I had to share. She is getting so big!!

Well I need to finish getting ready so we can go pet some cows. We are going to a farm for June Dairy Days. They are having free ice cream, petting zoo and hay rides. It should be fun and I'll post pictures later.

Air Show and Updates!!

I'm sorry I forgot to update you all on my job situaton. The week after Memorial day I started my new schedule at work. My boss came up with an even better work schedule than I did. I now work Monday, Wednesday and Friday from 9 am to 4 pm and Tuesday and Thursday from 8 am to 1 pm. It is an awesome schedule. I still have 2 days a week that I get off early so Asha and I can go and do a picnic, swimming or a park before we have to do supper and night time routine. PLUS I get to keep my insurance and I don't even think I'll have to pay a premium. Asha is also at daycare more so they cover more of the daycare so it turned out really well. She is adjusting to being there longer so fast and really likes that I pick her up outside on my longer days. She gets to play on the playground in the afternoon now and she loves it. That's how she figures out when I'm going to pick her up that day. She asks "Are you picking me up outside or at nap?" She is just so smart.

Last weekend we went to an airshow since her dad didn't pick her up. He took her this weekend since he had to come and move his son down by him. If Asha would have gone last weekend it would have been a month that she hadn't seen her brother and I want them to stay close.

The airshow was pretty fun. Asha didn't really have any interest in getting out to of the stroller until we got by the army vehicles. We went with a friend of mine and her son who is a year older than Asha so when he got out of his stroller to sit in the army vehicles Asha wanted to as well. She is just so happy riding along in her stroller that she could seriously do it all day. She throws a huge fit when we are taking a walk and I start back down our road because she just likes to ride so much.

Well here are the pictures from the airshow and some random ones from the week.

I LOVE my camrea. This is so much better quality than my old camera. The sad part though is that I wanted a better camera for taking pictures of Dakota at his sports. I could have gotten some awesome football pictures of him with this camera.

Asha sitting in an Army jeep. I think it's an Army jeep. I'm sure someone will let me know if I'm wrong.

Close up of Asha in an Army jeep. She had alot of fun.

Asha's new favorite pass time. I found a Winnie The Pooh game that we had for Dakota when he was little and I put it in for her and she LOVES it. She asks to play all the time. The problem is that she clicks all over the screen and the other day she had it in some strange language that I couldn't figure out. I'm going to look into getting her some more games. She has so much fun.

There baaaaaack!! LOL She dug the pink boots out of her closet the other day and wore them a few days in a row. I think they are starting to get a little small so I should hide them when she is gone. I did see some cute ones at Walmart the other day but might wait until Fall to get her some.

Here she is just being silly. She likes to wear her pants and shorts on her head for some reason. I plan on taking her to an African World Festival in August and they have the African head wraps there I think I will buy her one.


I did get her 3 year picture done and I will scan and post that soon. I'm not going to post the one of the 2 of us because it didn't turn out very well. We are both making faces. I bought it just to have one of us together but it's not that great.


Hope everyone had a great weekend. I get to go and pick Asha up in a few hours. I did talk to her on the phone yesterday and she did ask to come home but I'm sure she was having fun.